Officer Sawyer
LOCATION: IH-10 MP 664
DATE: 12/31/05
TIME: 8:13 PM
CONDITIONS: DRY, DARK
TRAFFIC: LIGHT
DIRECTION OF TRAVEL: WEST
VIOLATIONS: SPEEDING
SPEED LIMIT: 65
RADAR CAL: (Left Blank)
ALLEGED SPEED: 90
Are you fucking kidding me? My SUV is fully loaded with random crap I'm bringing back from Houston to San Antonio, and a bicycle is strapped to the back of my car. I am following Tiffany, who's driving 100 feet ahead of me and has her cruise control set on 70 mph. How in the world can I possibly be doing 90? My odometer reads 70 when the cop flashes his lights, so I pulled over.
Did you see my car back there Mr. Martinez? Yes sir I did, that's why I moved to the left lane, you were too close to the shoulder. Mmmmm....well, I "clicked" you at 90, you were going a little too fast (grim smile) I see, officer...Sawyer...I didn't realize I was going that fast. My odometer must be broken. Well, if you weren't going that fast I wouldn't have stopped you. (Well, that's funny, I say to myself, because if I ever go over 80 miles my car starts rattling and the wind sways it from side to side, if I reach 85 I'm about 1 mph away from rolling over. And I am in no hurry to make it home, and the car ahead of me is doing 70.) I see, well 90 is too fast officer. Yes it is, here's your ticket.
Thank you officer, Happy New Year, I hope the $196.00 dollars you're trying to get from me help your county meet its 2005 budget. Did I mention you "forgot" to include the Radar reading of my speed on the ticket? Did I mention I have a witness? See you in court bitch.
DATE: 12/31/05
TIME: 8:13 PM
CONDITIONS: DRY, DARK
TRAFFIC: LIGHT
DIRECTION OF TRAVEL: WEST
VIOLATIONS: SPEEDING
SPEED LIMIT: 65
RADAR CAL: (Left Blank)
ALLEGED SPEED: 90
Are you fucking kidding me? My SUV is fully loaded with random crap I'm bringing back from Houston to San Antonio, and a bicycle is strapped to the back of my car. I am following Tiffany, who's driving 100 feet ahead of me and has her cruise control set on 70 mph. How in the world can I possibly be doing 90? My odometer reads 70 when the cop flashes his lights, so I pulled over.
Did you see my car back there Mr. Martinez? Yes sir I did, that's why I moved to the left lane, you were too close to the shoulder. Mmmmm....well, I "clicked" you at 90, you were going a little too fast (grim smile) I see, officer...Sawyer...I didn't realize I was going that fast. My odometer must be broken. Well, if you weren't going that fast I wouldn't have stopped you. (Well, that's funny, I say to myself, because if I ever go over 80 miles my car starts rattling and the wind sways it from side to side, if I reach 85 I'm about 1 mph away from rolling over. And I am in no hurry to make it home, and the car ahead of me is doing 70.) I see, well 90 is too fast officer. Yes it is, here's your ticket.
Thank you officer, Happy New Year, I hope the $196.00 dollars you're trying to get from me help your county meet its 2005 budget. Did I mention you "forgot" to include the Radar reading of my speed on the ticket? Did I mention I have a witness? See you in court bitch.
posted by Juan Pablo at 12:42 PM
1 Comments:
HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!
What a great way to start the new year. I don't think your odometer was broken but rather his radar.
Hopefully he won't show up in court and you get it dismissed.
vanessa
Post a Comment
<< Home